damn damn damn!

I told myself that I would not stress out about this cycle. Whatever will be, will be. All I have to say about that is... Yeah riiight. I don't know if I'm mentally capable of not worrying about how a cycle is going to turn out. BFNs just SUCK BALLS. And not in a good way. :-P

I told Tony that we'd take it slow. Take it easy. I wouldn't worry so much, I wouldn't put pressure on him or on myself. Slowly that promise is disintigrating and each day that passes I find myself longing more and more for this cycle to work. I guess that's normal.

I need to create a mantra. Something that will help me be as stress free as possible during these stupid cycles. All we can do is try and try again if we fail.

I wish I didn't feel like pulling my hair out all the damn time.