No matter how you slice it, treating and loving someone else's kids like they are your own is never the same. The bond isn't the same. The love isn't the same.
Lately my niece has been acting super bratty towards me. Whenever I so much as talk to her she starts crying or acts plain ugly to me. I can't really fault her for it, she's only 18 months old after all, but it still hurts my heart. It hurts my heart because no matter how much I want to pretend that my nieces and nephews are enough for me it simply isn't. I want a child of my own. I want that bond that doesn't compare to any other bond. I want the smile that lights up a room when I walk in.
I guess I'm just selfish. And maybe hypersensitive today.
I let myself run out of meds like a dumbass and now I'm paying for it. Hopefully I'll be back to normal in a few days. In the meantime I am going to drown myself in too much Guitar Hero Metallica. I'm currently downloading the entire Death Magnetic album. Maybe my husband will spend some time playing it with me instead of spending much of his off time on the computer playing Diablo. I shudder to think how little time he's going to spend with me when he gets a new card for WoW. Some days I'm just more needy than others.
Completely random and off topic: The Monkey won tickets to Bama Jam today. It's just too bad I'm NOT a country music fan. Not even a little bit. The only band that's playing that even remotely interests me is the Black Crowes. And maybe Kid Rock. Though Kid Rock is favoring towards country lately and, again, I am NOT a country music fan. And, honestly, have never been that big on Kid Rock, either. We discussed selling the tickets. They're going for $180 a piece right now. We could always knock off some of that and have a better chance at getting rid of them. However, we don't know if we could get into trouble for selling tickets that he won. Our second option would be to just say screw it and use the tickets. The third, and probably best option, would be to give the tickets to my sister and BIL. Since they both LOVE country music and they have friends that are going. WWYD?
About Me
- Lissa
- Crazy little green-eyed girl. Fun-loving and mostly carefree. Enjoys loud rock music and driving too too fast. Loves flirting with disaster and teetering dangerously close to the edge of insanity. Has a semi-unhealthy addiction to makeup.
Regular Reads
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Roosevelt Brewing Company Continually in Progress10 years ago
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Back and Better Than Ever.11 years ago
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move along. move along. nothing to see here.15 years ago
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Feelings….15 years ago
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Creme de la Creme15 years ago
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Rawwwwr.16 years ago
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A test of faith17 years ago
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Encore17 years ago
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The birth – belated17 years ago
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Rain18 years ago
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5 comments:
Sending hugs. Tell hubby you need a little extra time and love from him for the next few days.
I'd give the tix to sis and bro in law.
I hope you feel better soon. =)
You are *so* right about kids not being yours- it is SO differnt. My nephew has had some bratty days and silly as it sounds, if it coincides with an overly sensitive day for me, it sends me into tears. We have to remember they are just kids. (IDK about you but some days I feel lucky to not have to deal with some of the kiddy things). Watching them grow can be bittersweet, no doubt about that.
Be sure and clue dh in on what your going thorugh, tell him you need some pampering and extra love right now.
I agree with pp-pass the tickets on. It'll feel good which is something money can't buy. And then theres the whole bit on karma-like pass them on and maybe somehow a set of metallica tixs will get passed on to you guys--probally not but a nice thought:)
If your sis and BIL would like them then pass them on.
We won some tickets this year to a festival we usually go to, but this year we are not interested in any of the bands.(even Dave mathews ;))
They are $400 a piece so we are selling them to help fund our trip to an even bigger music festival in Michigan. Lol.
If the same sis you're living with is the one who loves the group, I would give her the tickets. If not, I'd sell them.
I totally understand what you're saying. We've been keeping our nieces and nephews a lot lately (to help fill the void). I love every minute of their presence, even the bratty times. Unfortunately when they leave, all it does is remind me of what I don't have and probably never will. (((HUGS)))
I vote for the family getting your tickets.
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